”How did you lose it?”
“Were you drunk?”
“Another case of pickpocketing?”
These were some of the questions I have been asked close to a month now. There is no thrilling story of how I lost my device. It just got lost. I have been off the grid for a while. It seems pretty much interesting. For a while though.
The first few days were hectic. I felt like I was cut off from the rest of the world. I could not talk to my friends and the society at large. A few reached out; through messenger, the steam community, and email. Contacting someone you know via email usually sounds awkward. I tend to think email is where all conversations die and go to rest in peace. Unless they are from the bank informing you of your cheques or some other message shenanigans. I met a nice soul through email. Let’s just say I knew her before the mishap happened. She is a writer. Her work is well renowned and she speaks from the daily experiences.
At times she can be lazy and take long to write. But when she does do so, she bounces back in style. I did not have another way to contact her so email was the only way to go. That was the only conversation that never died in that graveyard.
I have always wanted to see how it would feel if I disappeared for a moment of time. Just to see if there would be anyone who would miss me when I was gone. I thought I’d find other interesting things to do or a bi of soul searching. I used to have a view of the world in my palms. The world’s emotion seemed to strong too be controlled and times it was devoid of emotions. A dangerous topple of the weighing scales and a place to be.
It has been almost a month of explaining why I’m not active on the social fronts and might be a huge inconvenience to those who have to talk to me through smses. Honestly, I’m not really bothered about it. I have learnt about myself in the past few weeks.
I tend to over analyze things at times. Ha-ha, it’s like I acquired a neat freak trait and order n everything. All is not grey, drab and gloom. In those past days I stumbled upon a relic. Asha 305. Clumsy and a bit slow since we are in the error of 4G networks. It took me a while before I could figure it out. Their app store is no longer functioning. I could not restore my contacts via google since the phone uses a Symbian operating system. Sounds old like Moses.
I tried installing WhatsApp on it and each time it would tell me that the phone was too far ahead of time and it would need an update. Backtrack to a year back, it’s all well until it decides to verify. “Your phone is too far in the past.” Is this what we call caught in the midst of time? I have no idea.
I love space and being in solitude so much that it offers a certain peace and calmness. At times I tend to crave for that banter from the ETS group that had slowly become much more like a family. Such a paradox it has become. There was an uproar I heard? Sorry guys, will be back for a while. I tend to think if more members from the opposite sex joined the bandwagon.
I do go quiet for long spells and one would mistake me for being cold or ignorant. I’m sorry it’s not your fault or mine. I detach at times even from those who mean well and want to know what’s going on behind the walls. It’s not that I do not like affection; truth is I don’t know what to do with the love received from all quarters. It is truly beautiful and gorgeous.
“Love is a good thing to happen in the world. Don’t you think?” They’d ask.
I have heard people say that I’ve buried my head in books for too long. I can’t refuse that fact at all. I like to know the answer to almost everything or tend to at least come with a rational reason to why things happen in such a manner. I consume a lot of content in all sorts of knowledge that seems interesting. It kind of explains why I’d go on and on, on something that piques my interests. Some would say it is a show off. I have come across that couple of ties. Too bad, I can’t help it.
I tend to correct grammar mentally and often look like a class teacher for thinking that maybe James or Mary would do just fine by reading a book or two. I like intelligence. Heck I would fall in love with an intelligent lady. Generally I like being around people who are smarter than me. Those who can give an extra knowledge on an entirely new topic or add more content to whatever I know. These type of people are not afraid to show that they are good at a particular thing. They do not make others feel comfortable or try to fit in by dimming their own light.
I love scenery. I come from a place where there’s much breathtaking views of it. The hills, horizon, and massive waterfalls that form during the rainy season. I love cycling and each evening I would cycle to different spots where I’d see the sun setting behind the hills. It is an unrivaled beauty. I would walk up to someone and tell them that they are beautiful or smartly dress and then walk away. I would not intend to know them after that, but I appreciated the fact that they were well dressed or beautiful in my very own opinion.
If heaven does exist, please let my room have a study of books. I have a small book collection of novels and works of renowned writers. It is like a small study. Theirs is that euphoric feeling one gets when they turn the page of a book each time they read. An e-book is efficient when you want to read on the go, though not thrilling as one would read from a hard copy. (Pun intended). I feel at home in libraries, there’s more that I could say and go and so forth.
I have managed to interact with people out of the social confines of the grid. I have gotten to know people. I do appreciate those who took their time and reached out to me. It is great knowing that one has someone who could look out for them.
It is 1459 hours, Wednesday, June 26, 2019.
The Grid can wait for a while.