Most of the relationships people have are for aesthetics. The ideas we have on love, entails are sold on bliss and are removed from the far realities of life. Allow me to talk to you on some of these realities.
1. Love Doesn’t Look Like How You Want It.
You can say you want to date within your tribe, social circles and the likes. That is good. It’s noble. Believe that. One thing however you can’t control is whom you meet. Social or personal ideologies shouldn’t taint something that might have a beautiful beginning to a nice romantic journeys. Most drop their potential mates maybe on perhaps they are not tall, dark and handsome. Or they don’t have that nice derrière. It goes for friendships too. It doesn’t have to be purely male or female. It can be platonic without any other parties expecting sexual innuendos from each other. Yes you can be pals with the opposite sex well out of the sexual norms and have much fun.
2. Sex Complicates The Relationship/Friendship.
Sex ruins things. Not most people can separate the emotions from the actions. Spiritual or not. Whenever sex happens between two consentig individuals, there’s a transfer of energy. The energy might not be that positive. It might leave you with a feeling of emptiness or more lonely. Ever messed with someone and you find yourself with emotions that were not frequent as before? Hurt?, Anger?, Impatience?, The urge and nudge to constantly check on them? Clingyness? Sex isn’t just sex.
Men you’ll need to understand if she develops feelings towards you after the act, be respectful about that. Women you’ll also need to communicate about your new feelings if they come up. Keeping numb about them won’t help matters either way. No need of being bitter about them. Talk about it. Inform him. Find a way on how to let him know. Don’t just rush and log onto social media and share your frustrations and rant about on how, “Men are trash, men aint shit”. Find healthier coping mechanisms. Alcohol won’t help either. We would be right here with our wise sayings when we see you on your timeline tripping.
3. Money Is Happiness. Money Doesn’t Solve Everything.
Most people say money is life. Money brings happiness. Money can even buy you the latest coffin to transport you back home. Money is such vice that will give you all the luxuries you can imagine on this earth.
Money can bring happiness or it can cause more arguments. You need to make sure that both of you are on the same page. If you pay for so much, you need to explain that to him in a manner that won’t cause friction. How you communicate matters.
Boychild, if you feel she isn’t appreciative on what you do. Find a calm way on how to tell her. I know some women will bolt away on the first sniff of problems or poverty or illness. Running doesn’t help either.
How they react, that is thier problem.
4. Social Media Doesn’t Care Neither Should You. The Internet Never Forgets.
Ever argued with someone online? And their bias towards you makes it difficult to converse? People oflate be catching feeliums on matters that could have been solved amicably. Pseudo accounts are created and the trolling might turn into stalking and cyber bulling. It might tear you to the core if your the faint hearted.
Most preconceived notions are amplified on social media. We get people who agree with us and some don’t. These can affect on how you relate with someone. If you tripped on whichever social media platform it might turn to haunt you later in life. Screenshots has made everything easy. A reckless post can end and shatter your career and leave you devastated.
5. Don’t force your Ideologies unto others. Everyone has different beliefs and Religious Standings.
This notion of forcing your ideologies unto others is just plain wrong. I have friends some are religious, some are atheists, some believe in science. I have seen both argue their sides with well documented facts. But that hasn’t stopped us from being friends. Grow a spine. Stand for what you believe in. Dont let others sway you.
It’s time I should step out and take a smoke. Someday I’ll quit them all together.