9th January 22

“I didn’t sign up for this shit”, Jonah said.

He wasn’t ready to do what the Lord had told him. There was no way on earth that he’d go to Nineveh. For Pete’s sake, why would he go down to that coastal city and preach? Why risk looking like a mad man yet those peeps were responsible for their own sin? Why wouldn’t Yahweh do away with them just like the way he did with Sodom and Gomorrah? Of course he wouldn’t tell him to send rain and flood the city. He has a certain tendency to do extreme things when it comes to passing judgement. But why did God choose Jonah instead of the many other prophets who were at his service? Jonah had no qualms about it initially. His main problem would be if the Lord would forgive the citizens of Nineveh after all that hubris of preaching and shouting then he’d end up truly looking like he was bonkers.

Off he trekked towards port. At the port he found a ship that was heading towards Tarshish. He paid his fare and went to the lower deck of the ship and slept. Mid-way into the journey God really became angry with Jonah.

“Why would he behave like a c*** whenever I send him to Nineveh?”

“Why dilly-dally yet I have been faithful to him?”

“What’s the big deal that he’d decide to run off to Tarshish? A whole thousand nautical miles in the opposite direction?”

“I’m done being taken for a ride by that little bagger.” Yahweh said.


Upper Deck

“Captain, the ship can’t hold on for long.”

“Captain the tag ropes can’t withstand the force of the howling winds,”

“Throw whatever cargo there is into the sea so as to make the ship lighter.”

Masts holding the sails could be had creaking, the ship was tossed from side to side by the huge waves. The thunderstorms were loud, even the roar of a thousand lions were no match for it. Lightning flashes could be seen a cross the sky.

“Let us all pray to our gods so that the sea can calm down.”

“Call each man on the upper deck.”

Jonah got roused from his deep slumber. He was led to the upper deck. He was asked how he could find sleep amidst such a raging storm by the captain and the crew members of the ship.

“I’m an Israelite and I’m running from the face of God. He told me that I should go to Nineveh but instead I’m halfway through to Tarshish. Bind me and throw me into the sea. That’s the only way the sea would calm down and that you’d not incur the wrath of Yahweh due to my insolence.”

You all know what happened to Jonah. How a whale swallowed him and the miracle of him staying alive for three days in it’s stomach before it delivered him to the sandy shores of Nineveh.

Then there was me.

I always said that I’d go to Bangladesh. Not Bangladesh the country but Bangla the slum. The largest slum in Mombasa, apparently mother had been commissioned by the Anglican diocese to administer to the daughter church of St. Mark’s Mikindani parish. I was quite keen and interested to know where that church stood amongst all the hullabaloo of the area. It would be my first Sunday to attend church on this fairly born new year. I was to attend the previous Sunday but I was caught up by the hangovers that came along with the celebration of ushering in a new year.

Last Sunday I accompanied her. What greeted me after getting off from the cab was the pungent stench that resembled a mixture of ammonia and methane. It brought the smell of the club, alcohol, and distinct murkiness of hedonism in broad daylight. It was a Herculean task having to cross over ditches and sewage trodden paths to reach the church. The church stood on a hill. It had a wide awesome view of the sea. Even despite it’s surroundings; the view of the sea remained unbeatable. I saw a woman heading down the shore. She smoked, she went down the hill leaving a trail of smoke. Absentmindedly tapping the ass of the burnt cigarette. She found a cool spot a little bit far from the mangroves and laid her mat on the sand.


It’s almost mid month. I have to take my eyes away from the screen from time to time and look at the pretty blue sky. I hope you folks crossed the year well and in a better shape and mindset. I hope you’re all working to make those goals, visions and dreams come true. Good for you. To more life, health, business opportunities, great sex, better courtship s and marriages and to new offsprings brought forth into the world Let me make another sandwich and some lemonade.

Definitely you’d throw me into the ocean like the way the seamen did with Jonah.

Before February I’ll release two books. But in the meanwhile if you haven’t read the other two I wrote, you can still purchase a copy of them here or purchase for your loved ones. You can also purchase the Amwadeghu branded tshirt. This space also accepting support from M-Pesa. 5338319 is the till number. Whichever the amount will be gladly appreciated to keep this space running. The quill needs ink to run on.

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